Bough

by Jon Atkins

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1.
05:02
2.
03:50
3.
04:49
4.
5.
04:58
6.
7.
03:22
8.
04:55
9.
03:43
10.
11.
02:58

about

Bough is a collection of recordings from three different venues. All songs were played on Bill Salisbury's classical.

credits

released February 3, 2012

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Jon Atkins Seattle, Washington

As naked as possible.

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Track Name: Even Keel
So it's even keel for the boats that we are now rowing.
I see the open sails for the land with the joyous glowing.
It came a little late, and the signs got a little blurry:
The fear of what I want floating away without me.
Am I just like you or do I need to be tied to the winter?
Are my horses dead or do they need to be put down and put to sleep?
Am I just like you or do I still get tired in the summer?
To me the sunlight said, "It would be best if you quit and were laid to rest."

It was a neutral day with the mask I had been wearing.
Could it be my fate with the love that you had been faking?
Through a silvery gate and beneath the bridges of patience,
My heart is on a plate while yours is in a cage of resistance.
Am I just like you or do I need to be tied to the winter?
Are my horses dead or do they need to be put down and put to sleep?
Am I just like you or do I still get tired in the summer?
To me the sunlight said, "It would be best if you quit and were laid to rest."

A little love by night, a little love by day,
I'm not getting my hopes up to carry you away...

Mother, your motherhood.
Your boy is down and he is not breathing.
Father, your fatherhood.
Your eyes don't speak, your mouth is not moving.
How is it understood that life is fair? That's nothing like it!
How am I understood if I don't scream when I stay quiet?
Now I am letting out that I grow weary.
I grow weary.
Track Name: Traps
Even though the light post told me where to go it refused to give me any direction. Windshield. Seat belt. Silent phone in the florescent 7/11. Terrible to say but when the heat is on there is really no choice but to say it: the failure of this connect to come through results in another connection.

Traps don't set themselves, I remember my second face.
Integrity won't build itself, don't forget you have a name.

Suddenly the sky went black to white and there was no explanation for this. Neither was there for the phenomenon of the rapid influx of rabbits. So was spread like wildfire the fear of myxomatosis. Little did the city know beneath my bed lay the antidote and diagnosis.

Traps don't set themselves, I remember my second face.
Integrity won't build itself, don't forget you have a name.
A trial will not heal itself, but it promises to end.
And I cannot take care of myself, thank you God for all my friends.

Good luck: no it does not exist in the sense you think it does.
I want you to know that real love would conquer anything, so you see, it's not with us.
You already know that if the memories of us keep calling, you got to let them go.
If the enemy resides too closely, you better just go...

Because traps don't set themselves, nor are they set by someone else.

Broken hearts, stay apart. The distance it might fix them. Slow.
But whose to say a different way would be better for our children? No.

Traps don't set themselves, I remember my second face.
Integrity won't build itself, don't forget you have a name.
A trial will not heal itself, but it promises to end.
And I cannot take care of myself, thank you God for all my friends.
Track Name: Sterile
Sterile as needles, I was starting to leak,
Through the spaces between my crooked teeth.
Don't look at me!
I was a lover before I suddenly died,
To the child inside the shadows of,
Los Angeles lust.

Los Angeles lust buries us, I believe it does.
Heavier metal will only feed your furious soul, but it's good to know.
Bluer shoegazer will only paint your lonely home, but its good to know.

Racing the readings of the clock by the bed.
The alarm is set for either sleep or sex.
What's the difference?
Who is a lover if every one of us dies,
To the child inside the shadows of,
Los Angeles lust

Los Angeles lust buries us. I believe it does.

Talking out the side of my neck, in the way that my dad did,
Until everyone feels like shit and I myself am exhausted.
Only when she's dressed in red have I said she is a girlfriend.
I become a son of a bitch when she sleeps in my bed.

I'll see you when I see you.

What is it of intimate love?
From the lashes to the last kiss,
Something forces me to run,
And turn around and miss it.

I'll see you when I see you.

Heavier metal will only feed your furious soul, but it's good to know.
Bluer shoegazer will only paint your lonely home, but its good to know.

Sterile as needles, I was starting to see,
The ugly in me and all my deeds,
Too easily.
Who could be lover of such a failing front?
Then I looked up and there she was,
Mary comes to love me.
Track Name: Spirit of the North
The spirit of the north is given to the south,
In open house.
There is nothing you could say could deserve what spirit gave:
Relentless grace.
The common man of God walks along the rocks.
He slips and he falls.
But the love that pulls him up is felt in his gut.
He lives it up.

Only when I doubt, I'm wasting love talk.
Only when she's around, I'm getting off the tracks.

It was robbing me of rest, the desires of my flesh.
I want, at best.
It's the way that I was made and it's the way that I might stay,
For days and days.
With the people that I meet and the love that I receive,
It gives me heat.
The girl that I just met, she'd been singing in my head.
I feel her breath.

Only when I doubt, I'm wasting love talk.
Only when she's around, I'm getting off the tracks.

And the father of the land was saying,
Something about my knees,
And the mother of the earth was weeping,
For lack of heat,
And now I see, the cold is me.
The cold is me.

The spirit of the north is given to the south,
In open house.
There is nothing I could say to deserve what Spirit gave:
Relentless grace.
I am a common man of God and I walk along the rocks.
I slip and I fall.
But a Love pulls me up from the center of my gut,
And I live it up.

Only when I doubt, I'm wasting love talk.
Only when she's around, I'm getting off the tracks.
Track Name: The Open
In a little while I am planning a great escape,
To the world right behind the holy gates.
Give me a little time, my heart is going to need to break.
And the pieces that define their shape fall into place.

That's alright, honey.
It all takes time.
And all I've got to give,
Is from the one who gave to me.
My family deserves to be free.

So I shook the hands of,
All I knew and loved,
And walked away,
Toward the infinite change,
Of the open.

Though I may be absent, when I pray and send you,
A loving thought through the filter of God,
You will feel it.

As for the kitchen tile, once cold and up against my cheek,
And the one with the sideways stance bearing down on me.
They said, "You better get up, this place is going to keep you down."
To the hero in the back of my head, help me out.

That's alright, honey.
It all takes time.
And all I've got to give,
Is from the one who gave to me.
My family deserves to be free.

Here we are.
I haven't seen you in quite some time,
But there you are,
You should be dead but you are still alive.
Save your breath it does not matter now.
What I sought to find I have not found.

So I shook the hands of,
All I knew and loved,
And walked away,
Toward the infinite change,
Of the open.

Though I may be absent, when I pray and send you,
A loving thought through the filter of God,
You will feel it.

So feel it.
Track Name: Christmas Day
I embarrass myself in front of family and friends on holiday and they ask themselves, "Why does he come?" What to reject of the mess? Was it the scent on my breath from yesterday when I considered myself so delicate? So delicate.

Here comes dusk with a whisper from behind,
Stay indoors, don't make the lengthy drive.
Soul mate lies to soul mate tonight.
See me leave when the shadows are turning bright.

I will break the screen and deny what I see if you let me in. I will take take take your Christmas. When I have cleaned my plate I will choose to escape my own mistakes and I will leave my debt to delegate.

For all the pain and all the rage and all the truth,
The surface: cool.
But underneath in boiling heat, the sweat, the steam had no release.
It was a Christmas song.
That's the nature of the bomb.
That night it went off.

Here comes dusk with a whisper from behind,
Stay indoors, don't make the lengthy drive.
Soul mate lies to soul mate tonight.
See me leave against my will.
I am blind.
Track Name: Guiltless
Please don't talk about,
The people in the house,
The way they mill around,
Reciting cat and mouse.

Please don't laugh about,
The colored playing ground,
The child stands around,
He may be listening now.

So he's been a single kid in a big mess,
So he's seen the birds and bees from a distance.

Now I talk about,
The people in my house,
The way they lay around,
The way I run my mouth.

I still laugh about,
The way I am in and out,
Of being quiet and loud,
Of having faith and doubt.

Because I have been a single kid in a big mess,
I have seen the birds and bees from a distance.
Complacent rage has never stayed in a good place.
Have you been a Sunday sinner? It's a Godsend.

I need my friends to recon me again,
I've gone beyond the reach,
Of any human hand.
I need my friends to cover up their skin.
I've gone beyond the sting,
Of any good regret.
I need my sex and violence.
I've gone beyond the sleep,
Of one and only bed.
I need my tricks to cover up the skin.

So I am a little kid in a big mess,
So I stand with the Son of man, guiltless,
I have been a Sunday sinner.
It's a Godsend.
Track Name: White Rain
The fabric of a memory has always scared me,
Like the failure of a barrier built to save me,
One glance at the monster in the back room,
My past is the dinosaur I run from,
But the wind begins to push me through places unseen,
And the fog horn calls me out to dark seas,
With white rain at the break of every Monday,
Real pain is pulled through every doorway,
So come on, come on, your love is notorious,
For us, oh please, don’t leave, it would bury us memories,
Some say a joyful noise revives a broken accordion,
I say one rainy day and we may not see the sun again,
The time has come for us to meet our maker,
The moon and the sun are both getting colder and colder,
The comfort of hysteria, the soothing mad rush,
The hands of nostalgia, I feel her soft touch,
And white rain only falls on absent Sundays,
Real shame is carried for a couple decades,
So come on, come on, your love is notorious,
For us, oh please, don’t leave, it would bury us memories,
Some say a joyful noise revives a broken accordion,
So play, play, rainy day and we may not see the sun again,
The time has come for us to meet our maker,
The moon and the sun are both getting colder and colder,
The life I love, its days grow shorter and shorter,
When the songs are sung then I will meet my maker.
Anger will unleash and bring the end of every season,
I despise the habits of my past and I repeat them.
Track Name: College Girl
Out of the mud and onto the bus,
She never had that much.
But what she had, she had to love.

Money for books and pretty good looks,
And the romance that she took,
From friends that she got hooked.

The way they lined up to see her,
And the way they lied just to feel her,
Came down when it all implied that no one really cares.

Stumbling up the college steps,
To the second i.d. check,
She remembers home again.

Laid in a trance, all in the past,
A glimpse of what she had.
You will never get that back.

The way they lined up to see her,
And the way they lied just to feel her,
Came down when it all implied that no one ever cared.

Coming awake on the seventh day,
The girl looks at her face.
The time has come to change.

"How many years have I been here,
Becoming all I fear?
If God could only hear..."

And the brightest lights completely failed
To begin to describe the way she felt
When God himself arrived in her beating heart
And Heaven unpeeled her eyes
She began to start again.
Track Name: Rested in the Sticks
Muscle jump eyelid shut frozen foot stuck
Frightened kid shutter stop clenched fist

Because he knows the cold is getting close.
It is Rested in the Sticks.
But then again his parents said,
"He's fine the way he is."
But they failed to say that they themselves,
Could not evade the mist.
How come?

On the vine and in the fruit, for the spines of you,
Heaven placed a seed of faith for the aged and for the youth,

Because they know the cold is getting close.
They fear it like us.
Oh God I feel the waterfall,
A universal 'hush.'
With a breath, I take the white away,
And leave without trust.
How come?

Come now, honey, don't mean nothing at all.
I'm not crazy, it's the way that I talk.
All my visions are escapable dazes,
All you ridicule a beautiful face.
Sometimes Love will have a way with words,
Sometimes clumsy just to see how it hurts.
I've got fear that could break a foundation,
But I've got love, and love is enough
For one black day.
I fall around your feet and marry you to me.
Track Name: Foul Play
This is the difference,
Between your jewelry and your gold,
Between your house and your home,
Between holding on and letting go.

These are the changes,
From once in a while to every day,
From black and white to grey,
Foul play.

Little trails of dust are kicking up,
Someone's baby says he is giving up,
When we believe that love is not enough,
Little trails of dust are kicking up.

This is your payment,
Here is your tension for self-control,
Your death for getting old,
And tired eyes for the restless soul.

These are the choices,
This is the 'Y' in the road I take,
The best of my mistakes,
Foul play.

Little trails of dust are kicking up,
Someone's baby says he is giving up,
I found out when I lost it, it was love,
Little trails of dust are kicking up...

...and I will let them come.
I know I'll never see the end.

Such an act of faith,
To accept that things might stay this way,
Such an act of faith,
Is foul play.